Is Sleep Training Bad?
I think it might be about time to clear the air around sleep training. A couple weeks ago, one of my Instagram reels picked up some steam and caused a bit of a controversy. Internet moms were accusing me of treating babies like robots (*insert eye roll here*) all because I was advocating for sleep training.
It actually got to be pretty ridiculous, but it did remind me of all the negative misinformation about sleep training that’s on the web.
I know sleep training isn’t for everybody, but for some families, it’s a complete game changer that leaves everyone better-rested, healthier, and much happier.
As long as you support your little one through the sleep training process, they will NOT feel abandoned or neglected and they won’t end up with insecure attachment issues.
What the studies on sleep training actually show
In 2016, Gradisar et al. published a study in the journal of Pediatrics that looked at the long-term emotional and behavioral effects of sleep training among 6 to 16-month olds. They compared two groups of families. The first group used the sleep training methods I advocate for and share with the parents I work with – graduated extinction (aka Ferber method or check n’ console) and bedtime fading (aka chair method or fading out) – and the second group was a control group of similar parents/infants who received sleep education but did not undergo official sleep training processes.
The study measured parent-reported sleep diaries, infant actigraphy (which is a reliable measure of sleep cycles), infant stress (via morning and afternoon salivary cortisol sampling), and mothers’s self-reported mood and stress each day. The researchers followed-up with the families one year after intervention.
The study found that families who sleep trained experienced significant sleep benefits above the control group, AND showed no adverse stress responses or long-term effects on parent-child attachment or child emotions and behavior.
Here’s another study...
Similarly, in 2012 Price et al. conducted a five-year follow up study of the harms and benefits of sleep interventions that was also published in the journal of Pediatrics. One group of families with 8 to 10 month olds received sleep training behavioral techniques delivered over 1 to 3 nurse consultations while a matched group of families/infants received usual care.
This study looked at child mental health, sleep, psychosocial functioning, stress regulation, child-parent relationship, maternal mental health, and parenting styles and found that sleep training using behavior techniques (like the ones you’ll learn with Healthy Little Sleepers) have no marked long-lasting negative effects and were no different than the families that received usual care.
And… we can assume the families who received sleep training help got better sleep on top of all that. 😉
Why sleep training gets a bad rap
The naysayers typically like to associate sleep training with the cry-it-out method, AKA the extinction method.
(In case you’ve never heard of cry-it-out, it’s a sleep training method that involves putting your baby in their crib fully awake and allowing her to fuss or cry until they fall asleep… without help from you. That means no feeding, rocking, and in some cases, entering their room to check in on them until it’s morning time or time for a middle of the night feeding.)
What you should know about the extinction method is that it’s actually pretty close to extinct itself. It’s not often used by baby sleep consultants because it is a harsher method, and a lot of parents worry about that.
By the way though, it’s okay for babies to cry! It’s how they communicate and it’s totally normal. But as parents, we’ve been hard-wired to respond to our littles’s cries – which is just one of the reasons this kind of sleep training method tends to not work out and gets the bad rap.
So, what’s the verdict?
While the cry-it-out method hasn’t been shown to lead to any long-term issues itself, the type of sleep training method you choose does matter.
At Healthy Little Sleepers, we use several methods that maintain connection. The differences are grounded in the amount of parental involvement. For example, we teach the specifics on graduated extinction/check n’ console, which is when you do timed checks. After you say your “I love yous” and “good nights,” you step out of the room. If your little one starts to get upset, you wait the first designated amount of time (which we discuss together and is flexible), and then you go into the room to check on them. And you continue this until your little one falls asleep. This is beneficial when you want to give a little more space while your little one learns to fall asleep while also maintaining support… It is also one of the quicker methods to see sleep come together.
We also teach bedtime fading/fading out. This method might be better for some families who are either room sharing or are not as comfortable leaving the room. In staying in the room as your little one falls asleep, it takes a little longer for sleep to come together, but as long as you’re consistent, it will. And sometimes quick isn’t important for some families.
There is no right or wrong in the method you choose. It’s all about consistency and setting a loving boundary around sleep for you and your little one. Having a plan is key, so you can be dependable, trustworthy, and not send different messages during sleep training.
And of course, the method you use in the middle of the night isn’t the only piece of the sleep training puzzle. We take a holistic approach to sleep training and also look at a few other essentials to helping your little one be a healthy a little sleeper.
Bottom line
Whatever sleep method you choose – especially if you’re working with our team – you won’t have to worry about your little one (or you can worry a little less - lol)! If you want to give sleep training a try or just find out more about it, schedule a free call with us now!